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28 Favorite Books for Catholic Book Clubs

Would it surprise you to learn I don’t have a single favorite book of all time? As any true bibliophile knows, asking a book worm to choose a favorite book is like asking a parent to pick a favorite child. It’s just not done.

Even choosing a list of favorites is almost impossible. The only way I can pick favorites is by having a clear purpose. So here you have my favorite books for Catholic book clubs. You’ll find a mix of classics and modern classics and a few quirky little known titles. In a book club, the main criterion is that the book provokes a good discussion, so don’t be surprised to see controversial titles on here!

7 Classic Books for your Book Club

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Evelyn Waugh’s classic story about Charles Ryder’s unexpected conversion is sure to spark a lively discussion. Does he convert due to the troubled Catholic family he meets or despite them?

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Wendell Berry’s Hannah Coulter is a lovely, thoughtful social commentary on the evolution and disappearance of family farming over the course of one woman’s life. Bittersweet and thought-provoking, this is one of the best books I read this year.

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This accessible Russian classic is a lengthy but very rewarding story of sin and redemption.

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Love it or hate it, Kristin Lavansdatter is a Scandinavian classic. Every woman identifies with some of Kristin’s struggles, joys, sins, disappointments, and atonement.

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Steinbeck’s East of Eden is a sweeping American generational story. His very realistic characters plumb the depths of sin yet show the flashes of grace in everyday life. For a much shorter yet equally gripping Steinbeck novel, try The Pearl.

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Consider Golden Age of Mystery detective story writers like Dorothy Sayers or Agatha Christie for a lighter classic book club pick. Gaudy Night is often called Dorothy Sayers’ best work. Agatha Christie said one of her favorite mysteries was Crooked house.

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Here’s an early example of dystopian literature that is particularly relevant today. Bradbury’s creepy yet captivating story about freedom of speech and thought is as timely now as when it was published.

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7 Christian Classics for your Book club

A love story, a conversion story, and a story of loss: this book is complex and beautiful. Perfect for fans of C. S. Lewis!

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Speaking of C. S. Lewis, one of my favorite books is his retelling of the Cupid and Psyche myth in Till We Have Faces. This book inspired one of the best discussion nights at my book club!

Buy it through my affiliate link: Till We Have Faces: A Myth Retold

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One more C. S. Lewis book! If you are looking for a shorter allegorical type book, The Great Divorce is a fine contribution to the tradition of spiritual journey books such as The Divine Comedy.

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Five for Sorrow, Ten for Joy and In this House of Brede are two Rumer Godden books guaranteed to thrill and surprise you. Soaring stories with deep insight into human nature. Check out my review of Five for Sorrow, Ten for Joy here!

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G. K. Chesterton’s name is synonymous with perfect paradoxes and incredible ingenuity in imagination in the best literary circles. For a first foray into this masterful Catholic writer’s fiction, try Manalive or The Man Who was Thursday. For non-fiction, I recommend trying The Everlasting Man.

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The beloved Little Way of St. Therese of Lisieux is brought to Catholics in a reader-friendly meditation style in I Believe in Love. This makes a lovely book to read during Lent, Advent, or any time you desire a spiritual classic.

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Caryll Houselander’s The Reed of Godis one of the most lovely and transformative Marian books I’ve ever read.

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7 Non-fiction Titles for your Book Club

Quiet was a transformative book for me in accepting and even embracing my identity as an introvert. I recommend it for a book club that likes science-backed books. Introverted Mom is a similar introvert-focused book with a more personal, feelings-based flavor. For a full review of Introverted Mom click here!

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The Girl with the Seven Names is a saddening, surprising, enlightening book about what it’s really like to grow up in North Korea. This is a great contemporary book pick that highlights current day issues.

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I’ve read most of Malcolm Gladwell’s books with great interest. You may find yourself disagreeing with his conclusions at times, but Outliers, Blink, and his other books are fascinating and may startle you out of preconceptions about how success is achieved, how we make decisions, and more.

Buy through my affiliate links: Outliers: The Story of Success and Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking

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The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks highlights ethical and racial issues in American medicine. Sure to generate a spirited discussion!

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Boys in the Boat is a quintessential American success story about nine working class young men who are determined to beat the odds and win a rowing gold in the 1936 Olympics.

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J. D. Vance’s Hillbilly Elegy is a modern day Cinderella story. This young man from a broken, addiction-ridden family succeeded in attending Harvard Law. Vance’s thought-provoking take on Appalachian America problems is balanced by his obvious love for his region and family. Quite a bit of language and domestic violence.

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Educated is another memoir about a girl from a dysfunctional family who achieved academic success. Lots to discuss in this controversial memoir! Check out my full review here! Trigger warning: domestic violence.

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7 Contemporary Fiction Titles for your Book Club

A Man Called Ove is one of those books that sticks with you long after you’ve closed the cover. An isolated elderly man has just decided to commit suicide when his friendly neighbors move in and turn his life upside down. A little crass, some language, but still very worth reading.

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The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is quickly becoming a modern day classic. This charming story pulls at your heart strings, and every book club will love the themes about books changing the course of peoples’ lives.

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A Russian aristocrat is told he must live the rest of his life in a luxury hotel. Great themes about friendship, isolation, civility, and community.

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This lyrical bestseller by Delia Owens is such a beautifully written book I had to include it despite some reservations. Pros: gripping coming of age story about an isolated child in the swamps; beautiful language and tribute to the beauty of creation. Cons: unnecessary sensuality and sex scene, not integral to plot and easily skipped.

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Where the Crawdads Sing

The Nightingale is a book that delves deep into the horror of life in occupied France during World War II. But it’s also a celebration of the strength and courage of the French women who helped win the war in diverse ways.

Trigger warning: lots of violence, rape, a little language.

Buy through my affiliate link: The Nightingale: A Novel

One last WWII novel! All the Light We Cannot See is a fascinating story about two children, one French and one German, growing up in the years leading up to WWII. A clever juxtaposition of their points of view carries the story towards their inevitable meeting in occupied France.

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In this unexpected novel by a Spanish author, a typical young woman comes to an eccentric town that seems to exist outside of (or in spite of) the modern world. Lots to unpack in this book about distributism, classical education, the role of women and men, and more.

Buy through my affiliate link: The Awakening of Miss Prim: A Novel

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Review of “The Letzenstein Chronicles”

Cover "The Letzenstein Chronicles"

In turbulent mid-nineteenth century Europe, a young English girl is summoned to visit her dying grandfather, the Grand Duke of Letzenstein. Letzenstein is a fictional tiny European country, clearly inspired by Luxembourg. The young girl is Catherine Ayre, a lonely orphan. Her visit is to determine the future of a country on the brink of revolution. The Crystal Snowstorm is the exciting introduction in Meriol Trevor’s magnificent Letzenstein Chronicles.

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An Authentically Catholic Series

Meriol Trevor was a prolific twentieth century Catholic author. Originally from England, she helped in Italy during World War II as a relief worker. She eventually converted to Catholicism and wrote a wide variety of books for children and adults. Several of her children’s books have been republished in recent years by Bethlehem Books.

Meriol Trevor is that rare Catholic author whose books inspire virtue and love for truth and beauty so subtly you almost don’t see her trying. Like its inspiration Luxembourg, Letzenstein is a predominantly a Catholic country. Catherine Ayre gets to enter a city and country imbued with Catholic culture and art. She gets to encounter a variety of Catholics: some who strive to live their faith and some for whom faith is a facade. Tweens and young teens will appreciate the authenticity of Trevor’s depiction: there are corrupt Catholics, even corrupt clergy, in Letzenstein. But there are also Christ figures and repentant sinners who will lay down their lives to protect the innocent.

Trevor is truly a master of gently nudging her readers towards the path of virtue. The good characters in Letzenstein are compassionate and admirable, and the villains are slippery and scheming. No young reader wants to imitate devious Julius; everyone loves Rafael le Marre, the repentant sinner.

Exciting, but not just about the Action

The Letzenstein books certainly do have plenty of action. You will find daring escapes, fast-paced pursuits, clever disguises, sieges, and schemes and plots galore. Yet Trevor manages to avoid any graphic violence. Further, she manages to portray the villain’s acts of violence as truly deplorable and revolting.

Really, the Letzenstein Chronicles are about relationships: between friends, relations, rivals, families. Each character leaps from the page as if alive. Trevor is such a master storyteller she leads the reader to feel deeply invested in the fate of her characters. She tells each story from the viewpoint of a 10-12 year old child, which draws her readers into the story in a compelling way.

Any Content?

The Letzenstein Chronicles are very clean with no sexual content. There is no graphic violence or foul language. On the other hand, there is some light alcohol use. Remember this is a European book by a European author so children drinking a little wine is culturally normal. There is one episode where an adult character is given drugged alcohol by the villain in an attempt to extract information. This perfidy is portrayed as very reprehensible behavior on the villain’s part.

A Treasure Worth Finding

I highly recommend The Letzenstein Chronicles for 9-14 year olds. They also make a wonderful read-aloud for 3rd-6th graders.

The bad news is, these books can be a bit hard to find. All four Letzenstein Chronicles are available as E-Books. And you can buy the paperback of The Crystal Snowstorm from the publisher, Bethlehem Books. But to buy the paperbacks of Following the Phoenix, Angel and Dragon, or The Rose and Crown, you will have to settle for a used copy. Consider emailing publisher Bethlehem Books and asking for them to reprint this wonderful series!

For more great books for Catholic Kids, check out my book lists!

Gardening Books for Kids

I love, love, love gardening! I think the process of planting and watching seeds grow is renewing and nourishing for our souls. Of course I want my kids to love gardening too, so we found some lovely picture books to get them excited for planting our spring garden! Check out these beautiful picture books and get motivated to start gardening!

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How Groundhog’s Garden Grew is my top pick for children’s gardening books! Gorgeous illustrations combine with great themes about hard work and sharing to make this a winner!

Miss Rumphius wants to make the world more beautiful, so she plants lupine wherever she goes. A beautifully illustrated book that encourages you to start planting wherever you are!

We Are the Gardeners by [Gaines, Joanna]

We Are the Gardeners is a sweet story from Joanna Gaines and family of Fixer Upper fame. The Gaines kids learn lessons about hard work, perseverance, and gardening.

In Whose Garden Is It? the gardener, animals, plants, insects, and weather all make a case for ownership of a beautiful garden. But Mrs. McGee ponders, whose garden is it really? I love that this book gets kids thinking about first causes! My 3 year old immediately said everyone was wrong and it was God’s garden really!

A Seed Is Sleepy (Nature Books) by [Aston, Dianna Hutts]

A Seed Is Sleepy is a simply lovely book all about seeds. From the mighty redwood to the sunflower to the mountain laurel, illustrator Sylvia Long makes each species come alive with her talented pen.

Up in the Garden and Down in the Dirt: (Nature Book for Kids, Gardening and Vegetable Planting, Outdoor Nature Book) by [Messner, Kate]

Up in the Garden and Down in the Dirt is a lyrical, creative book that bounces back and forth to show what’s going on below the soil and above it at the same time.

Bumpety Bump! is a very simply written picture book from Pat Hutchins. There are few words, perfect for the littlest readers. We love this story about a little boy, his grandpa, and a little red hen working in the garden.

Don’t have the space or ability to have an outdoor garden? Flower Garden is the perfect book for you! A sweet little girl helps her father buy the supplies and plant a window box worth of flowers to brighten their city apartment.

Sunflower House is a fun story about children who plant a circle of sunflower seeds to create their own living house! A great idea to try at home if you have the space!

Paddington Bear in the Garden is a cute story about everyone’s favorite affable bear, Paddington, and his attempts to build a garden in the Brown’s yard. With the help of some new friends, he builds a beautiful garden and wins a prize.

The Rose in My Garden starts with a single rose growing. In this cumulative story, a new flower is added to the garden on each page. Great to help children learn to identify flowers!

Each month in Lily’s Garden, Lily describes the work she does in her garden. Each page is decorated with useful information about how to actually garden. Great for slightly older kids who want to understand how to start seeds and plant.

From Seed to Plant by [Gibbons, Gail]

For the factual-minded, Gail Gibbons clear illustrations and explanations are the perfect match. From Seed to Plant is a great introduction to seed and plant growth.

In The Tiny Seed, Eric Carle describes one tiny seed’s process of germination, growth, and flowering. Great for helping kids understand the cycle of seed growth and production.

Looking for more great books for Catholic kids? Check out my book lists!

Review of “Our Lady’s Wardrobe”

Cover "Our Lady's Wardrobe" Sophia Press

Looking for a book for the Easter Basket? Anthony DeStefano’s newest book has just released from Sophia Institute Press and it’s simply gorgeous! This beautiful book provides a simple introduction to a variety of Marian apparitions in a novel way. Our Lady’s Wardrobe familiarizes young children with Marian apparitions by focusing on the many beautiful costumes Mary has worn when she appeared on earth.

Amazing Illustrations

Can I say again the illustrations in this book are wonderful? Juliana Kolesova’s light-filled style perfectly suits this book about the Queen of Heaven. Each page glows with an other-worldly luminescence that draws the reader upwards, like a Gothic church. My little girls can’t decide on which costume they like best: Fatima, Lourdes, Knock, or Guadalupe. Check out a full preview of Our Lady’s Wardrobe on Sophia Institute Press to see these beautiful images in full.

Simple Poetry for Retention

DeStefano uses rhyming verse to tell this story. The simple verse style reflects the atmosphere of simplicity and comfort in this story about how Mary loves and visits her children on earth. The rhyming verses also help children remember the various apparitions: Carmel, Knock, Guadalupe, Lourdes, Fatima, the Miraculous Medal, and more.

Mary Leads us to Jesus

DeStefano takes a thoughtful approach in this children’s introduction to Mary, being careful to begin with stating the Catholic position on Mary. He begins the book with explaining Mary’s importance in the context of God’s plan and role in leading us to Jesus.

“Our Lady leads us to the Lord, that’s what she’s always done.

She gave us Jesus Christ the King, God’s one and only Son.”

DeStefano also wisely focuses on the Marian apparitions which have been judged “worthy of belief and public veneration” by the Holy See, the highest approval a Marian apparition can receive.

Contrasting Heaven and Earth

DeStefano usually weaves some intricate themes into his children’s books, and Our Lady’s Wardrobe is no exception. I loved the subtle contrasting he uses between heaven and earth. On earth, Mary had simple clothes and was poor. In heaven, she is queen with a gorgeous wardrobe. This contrast is a great reflection of Jesus’s teachings in the Beatitudes. Mary’s life on earth surely exemplifies the Beatitudes, and in heaven she receives the rewards promised.

A Great Marian Book for the Family Library

Catholic parents can feel confident that this lovely picture book provides an orthodox, yet uniquely memorable, introduction to Mary. It’s a perfect way to help little children build a personal connection and familiarity with our Mother in Heaven. I think two to seven year olds will most enjoy Our Lady’s Wardrobe. This book is so beautiful it also makes a great gift for a sacrament or birthday!

For more great books for Catholic kids, check out my book lists!

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Disclaimer: I received a copy of Our Lady’s Wardrobe from Sophia Institute Press in exchange for my honest and unbiased review.

Cozy Fiction for Dark Days

When the days are dark- whether from winter dreariness or a period of suffering in life- some light, comforting fiction can do wonders to lift the spirits. Or at least push back the darkness for a little while!

“Where there is darkness let me bring your light.”

St. Francis of Assisi

Here are a dozen or so of my favorite “cozy” fiction books for the days when your spirit feels weighed down!

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James Herriot takes the blue ribbon for cozy in my opinion. The lovely Yorkshire Dales, the friendly country people, the memorable animals, and the never-ending cups of English tea create a comforting picture of a calm, peaceful world to escape into.

For sheer comedic genius, it’s hard to beat P. G. Wodehouse. The Most Of P.G. Wodehouse is a great introductory volume to this master writer. You get a little Jeeves and Wooster, a little of the Blandings crew, and some other short stories. Wodehouse’s eccentric characters are guaranteed to lift the spirits with their hilarious escapades.

D. E. Stevenson’s Miss Buncle’s Book is another cozy English country novel. In the lethargic village of Wandlebury, Miss Buncle writes a book about a girl who writes a book about a girl who writes a book. Yes, really. It sounds confusing, but is quite humorous in quiet, soft-spoken English fashion. This is one English village novel which doesn’t involve a murder!

However, if an engaging, light mystery is your cup of poison, I mean tea, then you can’t beat the Golden Age of Mystery writers! Dorthy Sayers’ charming Lord Peter Wimsey series begins with Whose Body? Agatha Christie has some lighter mysteries, particularly her Miss Marple Short Stories. Marjory Allighham’s Albert Campion stories and G. K. Chesterton’s Father Brown mysteries are also great choices in this genre.

To leave England for a moment, the international bestseller from Spain, The Awakening of Miss Prim is a Catholic book lover’s delight, full of references to great literature. Read my full review here!

L. M. Montgomery excels at drawing amusing, poignant, and memorable characters. Nearly everyone has read the Anne books, but her other books are charming too. Try The Blue Castle, The Complete Chronicles of Avonlea, and The Story Girl. Or just re-read the Anne books because, what can beat Anne of Windy Poplars for a cozy book to curl up with?

Jane Austen is another great choice to revisit for a comfortable reading experience. If you haven’t read some of her lesser works, Northranger Abbey is hilarious satire, while Mansfield Park has a likable quieter heroine. You can rest assured everyone lives happily ever after in Jane Austen. Well, the likable characters do anyway.

For a modern tribute to Austen, check out Katherine Reay’s Dear Mr. Knightley.

The vibrant blues and greens of this Mediterranean paradise leap straight from the pages of the Corfu Trilogy into your imagination. Gerald Durrell’s awe-inspiring descriptions of the antics of the abundant wildlife on the island is punctuated by laugh out loud memories of his eccentric family’s life.

The Club of Queer Trades, like most of Chesterton’s fiction, is rife with flights of fantasy, paradoxes, and an exuberant affirmation of the sheer interestingness of life. My other Chesterton favorites for comfort fiction and general hilarity include Manalive and The Flying Inn.

The Grand Sophy (Regency Romances Book 10) by [Heyer, Georgette]

Georgette Heyer is known as the Queen of Regency Romance for a reason. The Grand Sophy is one of her best loved and hilarious novels, filled with characters both charming and devilish, romantic entanglements, and misunderstandings.

The Story of the Trapp Family Singers   -     By: Maria von Trapp

The Story of the Trapp Family Singers is such a sweet, calming read about a famous Catholic family. Maria Augusta Trapp’s story of meeting her husband and children is only the beginning of this family’s adventures. She recounts their escape from the Nazis, immigration to America, and determination to create a home in the New World in the most charming prose imaginable.

I don’t love many of Gene Stratton Porter’s books, but Laddie: A True Blue Story is simply too sweet and appealing a story to miss. This semi-autobiographical novel is told by Little Sister, the youngest in a large family. Little Sister’s fierce family loyalty, delight in God’s creation, and inspiring faith will charm you.

At Home in Mitford by Jan Karon is a slow-paced, engaging small-town story about an Episcopalian minister and his “ordinary” congregation. But is any person really ordinary?

Warning: given the Protestant author and protagonist, there are some obvious clashes with Catholic beliefs (i.e. married priests).

Review of “Made for Greatness”

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Are you a Catholic parent looking for ways to help develop a virtue-focused mindset in your 8-14 year old child? If so, you will want to check out Made for Greatness: A Growth Mindset Journal for Courageous Catholic Youth. Recently released by well-known Catholic blogger Ginny Kochis of Not So Formulaic, this book is a valuable self-teaching tool which helps children own their decisions, goals, and choice of focus.

Virtues, Stories, Prompts, Prayers

In Made for Greatness, Ginny introduces your children to each of the four Cardinal and three Theologial virtues in a way they have never before encountered them. After a brief accessible definition of what the virtue means, Ginny plunges straight into concrete examples of Saints, and contemporary people, whose lives demonstrated the virtue. I appreciated the diversity of saints from around the world and everyday people ranging from a young American with cerebral palsy to an architect from Oman.

Ginny also includes journaling prompts for brainstorming, reflection, goal-formation, and prayer. There are also scriptural passages which relate to each virtue. By the end of each chapter, your child will have come up with a concrete plan to begin implementing the virtue in his or her life.

Neuroplasticity and Empowerment

One part of Made for Greatness I really love is how Ginny brings in science to back up her claims. If you’re a bit of a science geek like me, you may have read up on the emerging field of neuroplasticity: the amazing, God-given ability our brain muscles have to create new neural pathways throughout our lives. Ginny takes the concept of neuroplasticity and simplifies it so even 9 and 10 year olds can grasp that they can free their brain from bad habits and create new ones. Children (and adults!) can feel stuck in their usual way of life and doubt their ability to truly improve. Ginny uses science to empower children to believe in their brain’s ability to build better habits.

Great for Gifted and Special Needs Children

Given her years of wisdom from both parenting twice-exceptional children and writing for Not So Formulaic, it comes as no surprise that Ginny is meticulous in making this journal accessible for exceptional children. This book is written to work equally well as a solo study for an independent reader and writer, or as a joint project the parent reads to the child and discusses. The spacing is helpful for dyslexics, and color pictures and icons scattered throughout help visual learners. Gifted children will appreciate the science and broad scope of journaling prompts offered.

Made for Christ

The overarching message throughout Made for Greatness is both inspiring and empowering for children. This journal challenges children to develop a growth mindest: “a constant decision to see challenge as an opportunity for growth.” At the same time, it enables children to work past negative self-talk, bad habits, and lack of confidence. One of my favorite sections is the conclusion, where Ginny reminds kids they are made for greatness and gives new verbalizations to substitute for common negative thoughts.

I think both you and your children will love Made for Greatness!

I received a copy of Made for Greatness in exchange for my honest and unbiased review.

Looking for more great books for Catholic kids? Check out my other book lists!

Review of “The Awakening of Miss Prim”


The Awakening of Miss Prim is one of those rare, delectable books that you find yourself savoring, trying to spin out each chapter to the utmost. This novel by Natalia Sanmartin Fenollera was first published in Spain in 2011 and translated to English a few years later. The English translation is professionally done, and I could almost believe the novel was set in England, except for the Spanish character names. Spain or England, The Awakening of Miss Prim has a cozy, old world charm about it that makes it the perfect book to curl with of an evening, beverage of choice in hand.

What is beauty?

What is marriage? What is peace? What is the purpose of education? What is friendship? What is truth? What is love? What is beauty? These are the questions pondered in The Awakening of Miss Prim. Miss Prim, a young woman with a string of impressive scholarly qualifications, comes to the tiny village of San Ireneo in search of “refuge.” Refuge from what? She can’t quite say.

San Ireneo is a village some might call backwards in its way of life. It ascribes to a distributism of Chesterton, the courtesy of old England, and the educational principles of the Greeks. People from around the world with a shared vision of creating a utopia, a The Benedict Option: A Strategy for Christians in a Post-Christian Nation, have created a unique society and culture in San Ireneo. Miss Prim is at once charmed, bewildered, and offended by San Ireneo and its people, but soon finds herself forming unexpected friendships.

In The Awakening of Miss Prim, friendship is the key to changing hearts.

Naturally a deep thinker who prides herself on her acumen, Miss Prim feels consternation when both her employer and new friends habitually challenge her every presupposition about life, religion, and literature. For example, at first she is mortally offended when her friends in the San Ireneo feminist society speak of finding her a husband. Over time, through her friendships with some of the members, Miss Prim realizes their intentions were loving, and even becomes open to listening to their views on how marriage is liberating.

The most important relationship Miss Prim forms is her unlikely friendship with her employer, enigmatically referred to as the Man in the Wing Chair. A dead language expert with a formidable intellect, he seems to delight in poking holes in Miss Prim’s pet theories about education, religion, and literature. Yet even as he exasperates her, his courtesy and genuineness lead her to contemplate his arguments with an open mind.

Rather than providing all the answers to the “what” questions, this novel offers food for thought.

Is the redemption a fairy tale? Or is it The Only Real Fairy Tale? Is marriage a harmony? A drawing together of opposites? Or both? Is beauty a painting, a field of flowers, a feeling? Does absolute truth exist?

The Awakening of Miss Prim provides trails of breadcrumbs leading the reader to what truth, goodness, and beauty is. Or rather, as the wise old monk advises, “Don’t be surprised if, in the end, you find beauty to be not Something but Someone.”

Perhaps in keeping with the theme of raising questions that aren’t quite answered, the book ends quite abruptly, leaving the reader to imagine the ending. This precipitous farewell to Miss Prim and San Ireneo is, in my opinion, the only real flaw in this imminently enjoyable novel.

This book is refreshingly clean of all objectionable content, and can be safely read by teens, though I think adults will appreciate it more thoroughly. On the other hand, the abundance of references to master writers like Dostoevsky, Chesterton, Virgil, and more may inspire teens to read some of these other great works.

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Norcia, Italia where Miss Prim went in search of beauty.  Photo credit to my husband.

 

Review of “No-Drama Discipline”

Recently, I felt like refreshing my parenting techniques and exploring some new ideas. Browsing through recommendations of parenting books in a gentle parenting group, the title No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind intrigued me for a few reasons. First of all, it’s a mouthful. How did a publisher let that one slip by? Second of all, I personally am passionately adverse to drama in my relationships, so removing drama from my parenting sounded like a spectacular idea. Finally, I was interested in seeing how the authors, a psychotherapist and a psychiatrist, approached the subject of discipline.

SCIENTIFIC BASIS

The ideas on discipline in No-Drama Discipline are heavily influenced by emerging research on brain development. I personally found it fascinating to learn about the order in which the different parts of the brain develop, what brain integration means, and how neural connections are forged. The authors did a great job simplifying some weighty concepts so sleep-deprived parents like me can easily grasp them, using easy terminology like upstairs brain and downstairs brain. I appreciated their balance between keeping it simple, but explaining how each discipline strategy was focused on the ultimate goal of building your child’s brain.

CONTINUITY WITH THE SOCRATIC METHOD

Fans of the Socratic method of education will love this book, which advocates liberal use of questions and discussion. A huge part of “no drama discipline” is teaching your child to think, not just feel. One of the authors’ important concepts is “mindscape,” which is the ability to be not only the feeler and doer, but also be the observer. Put another way, mindscape is the ability to see one’s actions and feelings as if from the outside and analyze them. The authors say,

“When we teach our kids mindsight tools, we give them the gift of being able to regulate their emotions, rather than being ruled by them, so they don’t have to remain victims of their environment or emotions.”

One important way mindscape is taught is through a Socratic approach of initiating dialogues with your child to encourage empathy and insight.

IN HARMONY WITH THEOLOGY OF THE BODY

I was delighted to find that No-Drama Discipline presented a surprising cohesion with Theology of the Body’s respect for the human person. One of the fundamental tenets of No-Drama Discipline is that a parent must respect their child as a person, acknowledging and validating their feelings, thoughts, and experiences. No-Drama Discipline advocates collaborating with children to brainstorm discipline solutions together as a part of this respect for a person. It also empathizes the importance of developing your child’s neural network through relationships, noting that nourishing your relationship with your child is crucial in developing his full potential as a person.

DEVELOPING THE CHILD’S CONSCIENCE

Although the authors approach discipline from a secular and scientific perspective, they amazingly conclude that it is imperative for parents to help their child build a conscience! A big principle in this book is that instead of simply lecturing and demanding blind obedience, a parent should nurture the child’s innate feelings about right and wrong. They= authors explain that guilt is actually an important emotion to teach the child to recognize and respect as a sign that an action was wrong and not to be repeated. The authors say that

“Initial awareness of having crossed a line is extremely healthy, and it’s evidence of a child’s developing upstairs brain … It means she’s beginning to acquire a conscience, or an inner voice, along with an understanding of morality and self-control.”

OVERALL, REALISTIC

One other thing I really appreciated about No-Drama Discipline is that I found it be almost entirely realistic. The authors readily admit that there is no “magic wand” that will instantly end all bad behavior forever. They teach that integral parts of no-drama discipline are response flexibility, taking your parenting philosophy off autopilot, and being creative. They don’t claim that their strategies result in perfect child. But they do claim that their strategies produce more positive interactions overall and minimize damage when those really dreadful parenting nightmares happen. I think they are right, although I would love to see them do a follow up book on applying no-drama discipline to a large family situation where a parent is constantly torn between conflicting demands from a small army of children.

FINAL THOUGHTS

A college psychology professor said that a child’s relationship with their parents forms their view of, and relationship with, God. If a parent is authoritarian and dictatorial, that is how the child will view God. But if a parent is a loving and gentle, yet also consistent and challenging, teacher figure like Jesus in the New Testament, then this is the image of God they will see. I think this book helps teach parents to present that latter example to their child, so I highly recommend it to any Catholic parent.

 

Review of “Between the Forest and the Hills”


I was only thirteen or fourteen when I was first enchanted by Between the Forest and the Hills. Even as a young teenager I recognized this book was something out of the ordinary and it became an instant lifelong favorite. Author Ann Lawrence labels it a Historical Fantasy, but I find it defies categorization, effortlessly surpassing typical genres. You could describe it as a lighthearted frolic through lush forests with two children, or as a humorous yet profound philosophical dialogue between a Christian and a pagan, or as a thoughtful exploration of different ethnic groups learning to coexist. And there is also a fascinating theme running throughout about the existence of miracles. And a generous dosage of humor strewn throughout for good measure.

HISTORY AND PLOT

Lawrence set Between the Forest and the Hills in a fascinating place and era historically. Isculum is a tiny garrison town in western Briton, situated between the forest and the hills. Nearly forgotten by a declining Roman Empire, Isculum has become self sufficient. Between the Forest and the Hills begins as a leisurely stroll through this lazy little village where the town leaders bicker about theology, write down the history of their town, and wonder about the future of their isolated outpost. Young Falx, ward of the Prefect, stirs up the story and town by rescuing a little Saxon Princess, revealing the proximity of barbarians. The children’s meeting becomes the catalyst for war, alliance, friendship, and miracles.

CULTURAL CROSSROADS

Lawrence vividly portrays the uneasy melding of Roman, British, and Saxon cultures brought about through necessity. In the beginning of the story, Roman and Briton are already living peacefully together after generations of intermarriage. But the Roman-British town is fearful of the proximity of the barbarian Saxons. At first the only option seems to be war and the annihilation of one party. But through a miracle involving two talking ravens and the still unwritten Hallelujah Chorus, both sides reconsider and wonder if cooperation might be possible. The Saxon Torcula decides, “Even to be neutral, we must try to be friends.” The wise Roman prefect Frontalis agrees to an alliance, observing, “So the Saxons may outnumber the Britons in the end- so what? It’s the land that makes the people. In another hundred- two hundred years, they will be us. All we have to do is hold things together until the process is complete.” Lawrence certainly introduces serious and profound questions about immigration for a young adult book. Agree or disagree with her conclusions as you will, Between the Forest and the Hills is a great springboard for an immigration discussion.

CONVERSATION, FRIENDSHIP, AND CONVERSION

The books is punctuated by a series of exchanges about Christianity between Frontalis and Malleus, the Christian bishop. Lawrence paints Frontalis as a most erudite and noble minded pagan whose eventual conversion is the result of decades of friendship and discussion with the good bishop. These conversations offer great reflections points for the reader. For example, Malleus talks about the limited understanding of human beings at one point, “Uncertsinity is the perpetual lot of mortal creatures… We’ve no choice but to trust what we don’t understand, accept what we can’t believe, and walk where there’s no path that we can see.”

MIRACLES

Between the Forest and the Hills has an interesting thread of theme about miracles running throughout the book. The still somewhat superstitious British converts are inclined to see a miracle from the saintly bishop at every turn, to his comic distress. This raises an interesting question for Malleus: if seeing a natural event as a miracle brings people to God, is there anything wrong with seeing God’s hand in that event and crediting it to him? Malleus struggles with this question, feeling hopelessness and discouragement. But in his lowest moment of doubting God’s intervention, a true miracle occurs with his staff bursting forth into flower as a sign of hope.

CLEAN AND CREATIVE
I would wholeheartedly recommend Between the Forest and the Hills for advanced twelve year old readers to high schoolers. The publisher Bethlehem books recommends 14 and up, possibly because of the detail about the bishop, Malleus, having been married and having a son (this is in fact in keeping with the historical setting since priestly celibacy was not yet a rule). I loved Between the Forest and the Hills as a young teen and loved it more as an adult, recognizing more clearly how rare it is to find such a clean, creative book for teenagers. My hope is your teenagers love it as much as I did!